Signs of Attraction

Posted on: 12/03/2010

By Frankie Koehler

Was it the way they looked at you? Their constant chattering in your ear? Or perhaps it was the complete opposite which got your mind questioning this person’s feelings. Maybe the feeling is mutual or maybe it isn’t; but either way you want ways to tell if this person fancies you, right?

This is the bit where I am supposed to say that I have a fail proof method which will guarantee a yes or no answer. Unfortunately I have no such knowledge, but I do have tips on what behaviour to look for to see if someone possesses feelings for you. It’s not 100% accurate; but it’s the nearest you will get without asking them. So read on, if like the friend who asked me to write this, you want to know how to tell if someone likes you… 

The eyes. Big giveaway. When you fancy someone your pupils dilate and the edges of your eyes soften. These are only subtle changes, which your unconscious has probably picked up on before. This could very well be the reason you first wondered if that person likes you.

Does the person make a lot of eye contact? If they make eye contact throughout your conversations, that’s a good sign.

Do they avoid eye contact? A person who avoids eye contact could also like you, but they might just be shy. So if they don’t make direct eye contact, but look your direction at other times then they are probably intimidated by you.

Do they groom themselves when with you? By this I mean gestures such as fiddling with their hair etc. If so, they are just trying to look their best for you.

Do they make excuses to talk to you? Even if it’s just to say something pointless they will find a way to chat.

Do they ask you lots of questions about yourself and seem genuinely interested in what you have to say?

Can they then recall little details of things you have said, weeks later? If so then you’ve succeeded in nabbing their heart.

Do they disagree with you a lot? If that person likes you then they will probably agree with points you make, even if they don’t actually agree with them.

Do they playfully tease you? This could be jokily laughing at your anything but graceful fall, or gently hitting you over the head to grab your attention, etc. (However, this is only applicable if it is just light hearted banter. Don’t confuse it with bullying.)

Does this person make excuses to touch you? If they touch your hand, then they definitely like you.

Do they show off around you? Do they try to look cool in front of you and look around to see if you are noticing them?

Do they flirt with other people to make you jealous? A good way to test this one, is by checking where they look the next time they are hugging that person near you. If they can find a way to look over at you whilst embracing with that other person, then they are trying to get caught by you, so they can see your reaction.

However, people don’t always talk to those they fancy. If they feel intimidated by you then they will avoid talking to you. Even if they talk to everyone else there, if it comes down to them having to speak to you, they croak up and go quiet.

Nerves are another thing to keep your eyes peeled for. Does this person stutter when around you or talk really fast? Or do they mix up their words during conversations? If so they want to impress you; but aren’t that confident at doing so.

They may also try to show off in front of you.

The person’s friends are always a good indicator to whether or not that person likes you. Do their friends always look in your possible admirer’s way when you walk past? If so they probably know something.

They may even say something to you about the admirer to see if you like them back.

They may also play you hot and cold. One day they may make an extra effort to say hi and flirt with you, and then the next they may act like you don’t exist. Believe it or not, but this is a positive sign, as the reasons for them doing this is because they don’t want to make it obvious that they like you; and they feel that the day before they were too obvious, so they will act cool and pretend that you have no effect on them.

So there are my main tips. But I will leave you with one last clue which should help clear up any final waves of doubt. That is: Do they act differently with you? Whether it’s a case of them talking to you more, or talking to you less, if a person treats you differently to how they treat others, then the chances of them crushing over you are extremely high.

So there you have it, my set of clues to tell if someone fancies you. I hope that they help and please feel free to comment on this article or add any clues I have missed out which you think are of importance.


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